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Announcing the sixth annual Las Vegas SANTA RAMPAGE! Friday December 19, 2008 in Las Vegas! Last year we had so much fun on Fremont Street that we’re doing it again!
Santa is pissed off this year folks, between the elves ongoing union organizing, (dental plan?!?) the Chinese embargo of lead based toys, coupled with the rising cost of reindeer food, and FAA regulations regarding sleigh flight paths Santa is hurtin’ and he’s ready to take it out on the unsuspecting public in a big way! Lets make those bastards will pay for Santa’s pain damnit!
Join Santa, Friday December 19’th at 7PM on Fremont Street in Las Vegas in front of Fitzgerald’s at the Christmas tree for a Santa Rampage to remember!
Here’s the rules Santa (Santa hates rules but some Santa’s need a reminding from time to time because, well, they’re Santa)
1. YOU MUST BE IN COSTUME TO ATTEND SANTA RAMPAGE. Putting a Santa hat on over street clothes does NOT cut it. PLEASE DRESS UP as a Santa, an elf, a reindeer, Hanukah Harry, or something festive of your choosing, but either way as is always the case: DRESS UP OR STAY HOME. We’re really serious about this guys, Santa Rampage is a 100% no spectators event. Santas tip: Red Santa’s blend in better and can make more ‘holiday mirth’ he he he.
2. This is a 21+ event as Santa will be spending time in bars along the way.
3. Don’t mess with little kids! Nothing screams ‘please kick my ass Dad” like making a little kid cry. DON’T DO IT. Kids take Santa VERY SERIOUSLY. DO NOT approach kids unless you check with the parents first. DO NOT hand anything to kids unless you check with the parents first. Santa’s tip: The best strategy it to simply avoid little kids whenever possible.
4. But along those same lines; BRING TOYS OR GIFTS to give out along the way. People LOVE to get free stuff from Santa, think cheap lightweight gifts that you can easily get too. This Santa’s favorite gift: army men (they keep you safe).
5. Don’t mess with the cops OR hotel security. These casinos don’t give a damn about Santa and we will leave your happy ass to your fate if your start any trouble in a Casino Santa. Always do what they say, when they say it. If Santa is asked to leave a Casino then Santa will wait out front until the next departure time and then move as a group. See schedule below Santa.
6. Don’t mess with shops or retailers. If you start trouble, if you break something, if you get into an altercation of any kind, Santa will leave you to your fate. Santa’s got a schedule to keep and Santa doesn’t care that you can’t handle your booze or whatever. Making holiday mirth is great, but be NICE. After all you’re friggin’ Santa Santa!
7. STAY TOGETHER AT ALL TIMES. “No force on earth can stop a hundred Santa’s” is true, but there are a lot of forces that can stop one or two Santa’s. Not everyone ‘gets’ Santa. Particularly as we get later into the evening; there’s power in numbers, USE IT.
8. NO ONE IS IN CHARGE. The answer to almost every inquiry is simply “SANTA” Examples: Who are you guys? Santa. Who organized this? Santa Why are you doing this? I’m Santa What’s the special occasion? I’m Santa Can I take a picture with you? Santa needs $5 or a beer (!). Every year Santa is amazed that certain Santa’s fall out of character and point at this Santa while saying ‘Well this guy is in charge or he organized it”. NO NO NO. Lets stay in character Santa ok? I am Santa, YOU are Santa, Santa is Santa. See a pattern here Santa? Great!
9. Bring some spending money. Even if you don’t drink booze bring a few bucks for snacks or fluids. Though this is a FREE EVENT, stuff still costs money and hugs won’t buy you a soda or bottle of water. Santa’s drinking tip: BYOB in a well concealed flask or bottle. Oh yea; BRING YOUR I.D. SANTA (friggin’ DUH!) See other drinking tips below Santa.
10. EAT DINNER BEFORE YOU ARRIVE. Every year Santa is amazed that certain Santa’s want all of Santa to wait while Santa goes off for a burger or something. Please don’t expect Santa to wait for Santa Santa. Show up hydrated and well fed and you will have a great time Santa. Santa has a schedule to keep Santa.
11. SHOW UP ON TIME. Getting to Santa Rampage will take longer than you expect. Please show up on time for Caroling Santa! We are meeting at 7PM in from of Fitzgerald’s on Fremont Street at the Christmas tree.
OTER STUFF and tips Santa has learned from over 6 years of rampaging:
• Caroling: Santa will provide you with the Santa Rampage lyrics, Please don’t print your own. Santa will have PLENTY of copies for everyone. This way Santa can stay on the same page (all pun intended) when singing our perverted Carols for the public.
• WEAR GOOD SHOES. This is A LOT OF WALKING. No really ladies in particular, those 6 inch stilettos make LOOK great with your naughty elf costume (meow!), but 3 miles into our trek you WILL be dying and Santa needs you with us all night! Santa strongly suggests that you choose FORM over FASHION for this event. Or, bring a pair of sneakers too perhaps?
• Check your costume before you leave the house. It’s okay to buy a Santa costume the day of Santa Rampage (well not really, slacker noobie Santa), but try it on first and see how it works, like if the pants are going to fail, if it has pockets, is it WARM enough, how you’re going to carry all of your stuff all night, etc. Santa’s tip: do a complete costume shake down the day before the rampage to check for and correct any problems.
• Balanced drinking strategy. This is a marathon night and will wear you out. This Santa prefers to drink two alcohol drinks and ONE non sugar, non caffeine drink to offset the booze. This maintains a happy buzz while not getting too loaded too soon. That would mean two beers and one water, and maintain this ratio all night. This Santa has seen numerous Santa’s go ‘down the drain’ by over drinking too early in the evening. This ratio ensures a happy and hydrated Santa well into the wee hours. Santa’s tip: if you’re not peeing then you’re dehydrated. This Santa has also learned that the more loaded Santa gets the LESS fun Santa has. (who knew?) This Santa’s just sayin’ Santa.
• GET A ROOM SANTA! Rooms on Fremont Street can be had for around $49 or less. It’s really nice for Santa to have a room to escape to after (during?) the rampage. This prevents Santa from getting a DUI or worse when Santa has had enough rampaging. See links below.
• Be ready to have the MOST FUN YOU WILL EVER HAVE WITH YOUR CLOTHES ON. Santa Rampage, Santacon, Santarchy, call it what you want to but this has been going on around the world for many years. Las Vegas is simply THE BEST PLACE to do this in the U.S. and Santa guarantees you a rampage to remember. Last year we had over 50 well prepared and cacophonous Santa’s. Can we top that number this year? You tell us Santa. Tell your friends, make sure they understand the rules and come in costume. Come prepared for fun Santa!!
Santa will see YOU Santa on Fremont St, at 7PM in front of Fitzgerald’s at the Christmas tree. Santa needs to say this again too Santa, because every year some dumb ass poseur/spectator Santa shows up not in costume expecting to be welcomed by Santa; Putting a Santa hat on over street clothes DOES NOT CUT IT. DRESS UP OR STAY HOME SANTA.
No really……. Jeesh.
Links:
www.santacon.com/
santarchy.com/
santarchy.com/cheap-santa-suits/
www.nightmarefactory.com/santa.html
Oriental Trading Co tinyurl.com/5quegg
Map to Starting Location tinyurl.com/63qsnl
Rooms on Fremont
Fitzgerald’s: www.fitzgeraldslasvegas.com/vega....html
Golden Nugget: www.goldennugget.com/home.asp
Or do an Expedia search for rooms.
SCHEDULE FOR SANTA RAMPAGE 2008.
SUBJECT TO CHANGE. Please check the Las Vegas Burning Man list, your source for all things Santa, Santa for any updates.
groups.yahoo.com/group/las...urningman/
7:00pm- Santa meets at Christmas tree in front of Fitzgerald's. The party begins with caroling!
8:00pm- Santa departs Christmas tree for King's Bar in the Four Queen's casino to warm up with a cocktail!
8:30pm- Santa departs Four Queen's for Gold Digger's club upstairs in the Golden Nugget (live band, dancing and it also has a patio that overlooks Fremont St.).
9:30pm- Santa departs Gold Digger's club for the Golden Gate casino's famous 99 cent shrimp cocktail and cheap beer!
10:00pm - Santa departs Golden Gate casino for caroling under the Fremont St. canopy.
10:30pm - Santa goes into Boomer's nightclub in Binion's Horseshoe for dancing!
11:15pm - Santa departs Binion's Horseshoe for Hogs N Heifers, yee-haw get yer bar dance on Santa!
12:15am- Santa departs Hogs N Heifers for Mickey Finnz, for live band.
1:00am- Santa leaves Mickey Finnz for the Beauty Bar, for rock DJ.
2:00am- Santa leaves Beauty Bar for nutritional and healthy breakfast at Fitzgerald's Courtyard Grill or other breakfast location TBD.
Please note: This is morphed from last year’s schedule. Santa still needs to do recon down on Fremont in the next couple of weeks to verify this schedule will work for Santa completely. Again, please check the list for any updates Santa. If this changes, Santa will post it to that list Santa.
Final checklist:
1. Costume, gifts, personal items
2. Good shoes
3. Spending money
4. I.D. BRING YOUR I.D. SANTA!
5. Flask or container
6. Camera
7. Schedule printed in case of separation from Santa
8. Room booked in advance
9. Eat dinner first
10. Stay hydrated
NO SPECTATORS, DRESS UP OR STAY HOME SANTA, RADICAL SELF RELIANCE
****************************************************
Announcing the sixth annual Las Vegas SANTA RAMPAGE! Friday December 19, 2008 in Las Vegas! Last year we had so much fun on Fremont Street that we’re doing it again!
Santa is pissed off this year folks, between the elves ongoing union organizing, (dental plan?!?) the Chinese embargo of lead based toys, coupled with the rising cost of reindeer food, and FAA regulations regarding sleigh flight paths Santa is hurtin’ and he’s ready to take it out on the unsuspecting public in a big way! Lets make those bastards will pay for Santa’s pain damnit!
Join Santa, Friday December 19’th at 7PM on Fremont Street in Las Vegas in front of Fitzgerald’s at the Christmas tree for a Santa Rampage to remember!
Here’s the rules Santa (Santa hates rules but some Santa’s need a reminding from time to time because, well, they’re Santa)
1. YOU MUST BE IN COSTUME TO ATTEND SANTA RAMPAGE. Putting a Santa hat on over street clothes does NOT cut it. PLEASE DRESS UP as a Santa, an elf, a reindeer, Hanukah Harry, or something festive of your choosing, but either way as is always the case: DRESS UP OR STAY HOME. We’re really serious about this guys, Santa Rampage is a 100% no spectators event. Santas tip: Red Santa’s blend in better and can make more ‘holiday mirth’ he he he.
2. This is a 21+ event as Santa will be spending time in bars along the way.
3. Don’t mess with little kids! Nothing screams ‘please kick my ass Dad” like making a little kid cry. DON’T DO IT. Kids take Santa VERY SERIOUSLY. DO NOT approach kids unless you check with the parents first. DO NOT hand anything to kids unless you check with the parents first. Santa’s tip: The best strategy it to simply avoid little kids whenever possible.
4. But along those same lines; BRING TOYS OR GIFTS to give out along the way. People LOVE to get free stuff from Santa, think cheap lightweight gifts that you can easily get too. This Santa’s favorite gift: army men (they keep you safe).
5. Don’t mess with the cops OR hotel security. These casinos don’t give a damn about Santa and we will leave your happy ass to your fate if your start any trouble in a Casino Santa. Always do what they say, when they say it. If Santa is asked to leave a Casino then Santa will wait out front until the next departure time and then move as a group. See schedule below Santa.
6. Don’t mess with shops or retailers. If you start trouble, if you break something, if you get into an altercation of any kind, Santa will leave you to your fate. Santa’s got a schedule to keep and Santa doesn’t care that you can’t handle your booze or whatever. Making holiday mirth is great, but be NICE. After all you’re friggin’ Santa Santa!
7. STAY TOGETHER AT ALL TIMES. “No force on earth can stop a hundred Santa’s” is true, but there are a lot of forces that can stop one or two Santa’s. Not everyone ‘gets’ Santa. Particularly as we get later into the evening; there’s power in numbers, USE IT.
8. NO ONE IS IN CHARGE. The answer to almost every inquiry is simply “SANTA” Examples: Who are you guys? Santa. Who organized this? Santa Why are you doing this? I’m Santa What’s the special occasion? I’m Santa Can I take a picture with you? Santa needs $5 or a beer (!). Every year Santa is amazed that certain Santa’s fall out of character and point at this Santa while saying ‘Well this guy is in charge or he organized it”. NO NO NO. Lets stay in character Santa ok? I am Santa, YOU are Santa, Santa is Santa. See a pattern here Santa? Great!
9. Bring some spending money. Even if you don’t drink booze bring a few bucks for snacks or fluids. Though this is a FREE EVENT, stuff still costs money and hugs won’t buy you a soda or bottle of water. Santa’s drinking tip: BYOB in a well concealed flask or bottle. Oh yea; BRING YOUR I.D. SANTA (friggin’ DUH!) See other drinking tips below Santa.
10. EAT DINNER BEFORE YOU ARRIVE. Every year Santa is amazed that certain Santa’s want all of Santa to wait while Santa goes off for a burger or something. Please don’t expect Santa to wait for Santa Santa. Show up hydrated and well fed and you will have a great time Santa. Santa has a schedule to keep Santa.
11. SHOW UP ON TIME. Getting to Santa Rampage will take longer than you expect. Please show up on time for Caroling Santa! We are meeting at 7PM in from of Fitzgerald’s on Fremont Street at the Christmas tree.
OTER STUFF and tips Santa has learned from over 6 years of rampaging:
• Caroling: Santa will provide you with the Santa Rampage lyrics, Please don’t print your own. Santa will have PLENTY of copies for everyone. This way Santa can stay on the same page (all pun intended) when singing our perverted Carols for the public.
• WEAR GOOD SHOES. This is A LOT OF WALKING. No really ladies in particular, those 6 inch stilettos make LOOK great with your naughty elf costume (meow!), but 3 miles into our trek you WILL be dying and Santa needs you with us all night! Santa strongly suggests that you choose FORM over FASHION for this event. Or, bring a pair of sneakers too perhaps?
• Check your costume before you leave the house. It’s okay to buy a Santa costume the day of Santa Rampage (well not really, slacker noobie Santa), but try it on first and see how it works, like if the pants are going to fail, if it has pockets, is it WARM enough, how you’re going to carry all of your stuff all night, etc. Santa’s tip: do a complete costume shake down the day before the rampage to check for and correct any problems.
• Balanced drinking strategy. This is a marathon night and will wear you out. This Santa prefers to drink two alcohol drinks and ONE non sugar, non caffeine drink to offset the booze. This maintains a happy buzz while not getting too loaded too soon. That would mean two beers and one water, and maintain this ratio all night. This Santa has seen numerous Santa’s go ‘down the drain’ by over drinking too early in the evening. This ratio ensures a happy and hydrated Santa well into the wee hours. Santa’s tip: if you’re not peeing then you’re dehydrated. This Santa has also learned that the more loaded Santa gets the LESS fun Santa has. (who knew?) This Santa’s just sayin’ Santa.
• GET A ROOM SANTA! Rooms on Fremont Street can be had for around $49 or less. It’s really nice for Santa to have a room to escape to after (during?) the rampage. This prevents Santa from getting a DUI or worse when Santa has had enough rampaging. See links below.
• Be ready to have the MOST FUN YOU WILL EVER HAVE WITH YOUR CLOTHES ON. Santa Rampage, Santacon, Santarchy, call it what you want to but this has been going on around the world for many years. Las Vegas is simply THE BEST PLACE to do this in the U.S. and Santa guarantees you a rampage to remember. Last year we had over 50 well prepared and cacophonous Santa’s. Can we top that number this year? You tell us Santa. Tell your friends, make sure they understand the rules and come in costume. Come prepared for fun Santa!!
Santa will see YOU Santa on Fremont St, at 7PM in front of Fitzgerald’s at the Christmas tree. Santa needs to say this again too Santa, because every year some dumb ass poseur/spectator Santa shows up not in costume expecting to be welcomed by Santa; Putting a Santa hat on over street clothes DOES NOT CUT IT. DRESS UP OR STAY HOME SANTA.
No really……. Jeesh.
Links:
www.santacon.com/
santarchy.com/
santarchy.com/cheap-santa-suits/
www.nightmarefactory.com/santa.html
Oriental Trading Co tinyurl.com/5quegg
Map to Starting Location tinyurl.com/63qsnl
Rooms on Fremont
Fitzgerald’s: www.fitzgeraldslasvegas.com/vega....html
Golden Nugget: www.goldennugget.com/home.asp
Or do an Expedia search for rooms.
SCHEDULE FOR SANTA RAMPAGE 2008.
SUBJECT TO CHANGE. Please check the Las Vegas Burning Man list, your source for all things Santa, Santa for any updates.
groups.yahoo.com/group/las...urningman/
7:00pm- Santa meets at Christmas tree in front of Fitzgerald's. The party begins with caroling!
8:00pm- Santa departs Christmas tree for King's Bar in the Four Queen's casino to warm up with a cocktail!
8:30pm- Santa departs Four Queen's for Gold Digger's club upstairs in the Golden Nugget (live band, dancing and it also has a patio that overlooks Fremont St.).
9:30pm- Santa departs Gold Digger's club for the Golden Gate casino's famous 99 cent shrimp cocktail and cheap beer!
10:00pm - Santa departs Golden Gate casino for caroling under the Fremont St. canopy.
10:30pm - Santa goes into Boomer's nightclub in Binion's Horseshoe for dancing!
11:15pm - Santa departs Binion's Horseshoe for Hogs N Heifers, yee-haw get yer bar dance on Santa!
12:15am- Santa departs Hogs N Heifers for Mickey Finnz, for live band.
1:00am- Santa leaves Mickey Finnz for the Beauty Bar, for rock DJ.
2:00am- Santa leaves Beauty Bar for nutritional and healthy breakfast at Fitzgerald's Courtyard Grill or other breakfast location TBD.
Please note: This is morphed from last year’s schedule. Santa still needs to do recon down on Fremont in the next couple of weeks to verify this schedule will work for Santa completely. Again, please check the list for any updates Santa. If this changes, Santa will post it to that list Santa.
Final checklist:
1. Costume, gifts, personal items
2. Good shoes
3. Spending money
4. I.D. BRING YOUR I.D. SANTA!
5. Flask or container
6. Camera
7. Schedule printed in case of separation from Santa
8. Room booked in advance
9. Eat dinner first
10. Stay hydrated
NO SPECTATORS, DRESS UP OR STAY HOME SANTA, RADICAL SELF RELIANCE
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